The Only Constant
by jouve25
Summary: This follows the S8 episode 'Fortunate Son'. What happens when Commander Lindsay's recommendations are accepted?
1. Chapter One

The Only Constant  
-----------------  
By: Anand Rao  
This takes place after the S8 episode 'Fortunate Son'  
  
Chapter One  
---------------  
  
DAY 1:  
  
The SECNAV stared at Admiral Cheggwidden with a sickeningly earnest look on his face. "I hope this doesn't disrupt JAG too much, AJ, but these changes. . . they really are for the best."  
  
"I understand, Sir." AJ replied stiffly.   
  
"Well, I'm glad we've had this discussion." The SECNAV stood up, pausing as he exited Cheggwidden's office. "The only constant is change, Admiral."  
  
Left alone in his office, AJ sighed and leaned back in his chair. "Some changes are better than others," he muttered.  
*********************************  
  
Harm knocked on the admiral's door and stepped inside. "You wanted to see me, Sir?"   
  
"Come in, Commander. Have a seat." AJ stared at Harm for a few moments then leaned forward. "In the seven plus years we've worked together, have I changed much?" he asked.  
  
Puzzled by his CO's question, Harm frowned thoughtfully before answering. "I would have to say that you become less. . . ambitious since we first met, Sir."  
  
"That's the truth." AJ chuckled. "When I first came her, I actually had my eye on the CNO seat." He shook his head ruefully. "That seems like a life time ago."  
  
"Admiral. . . what's this about?"  
  
"The SECNAV came by earlier today with the results of Commander Lindsay's audit."  
  
"Ah. I see." Harm nodded his head in resignation.   
  
"He made some rather. . . drastic recommendations," AJ added.  
  
Harm laughed. "Let me guess. A variety of reassignments?"  
  
"Is that the scuttlebutt?"   
  
"No, I heard that one from Lindsay himself. So, should I be making plans to head for Norway?" Harm asked lightly.  
  
"Do you think this is a joke, Commander?" AJ asked tightly.  
  
Harm stiffened. "No, Sir."  
  
AJ sighed. "I managed to convince the SECNAV the I should be responsible for any reassignments at JAG. So, in general, Commander Lindsay's recommendations will be implemented, but the specifics are going to up to me. You've been here longer than anyone, Harm. I wanted to let know about these changes first." He took a deep breath then continued. "Lieutenant Simms will be transferred back to the OIG. Lieutenant Roberts and Commander Turner will remain here. Colonel MacKenzie will remain in the Judiciary. . . on a permanent basis. As for you-"   
  
"Admiral, I've been thinking about retiring," Harm stated before AJ could finish.  
  
AJ's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "Since when?" He demanded.  
  
"For a while now, actually," Harm replied, unable to look his CO in the eye. "Let's face it, Sir, my past two years here have been less than stellar."  
  
"Commander, in the past two years, you've saved more Naval careers than I can count. Everyone from humble Airmen to arrogant two stars, including a young Lieutenant who works in this very office. You've successfully communicated constantly changing ROEs to fleet JAGs and have become something of a leader to the JAG officers who serve upon our vessels." AJ leaned forward. "Oh, and let's not forget that you recently received the Silver Star for saving a carrier group from a nuclear threat. There's a reason you're on the Navy's recruitment posters, Harm. Nobody is perfect, but sometimes, you come damn close."  
  
Harm sat back, stunned. "Sir, I . . ."  
  
AJ cleared his throat quickly. "So, we've cleared up this doubt about your abilities and accomplishments. . . why *else* do you want to retire?"  
  
Harm thought about it for a few minutes, then nodded his head. "Lately, I haven't been able to separate my emotions from my work. I'm not sure what happened. I used to be so good at leaving it all in the courtroom. But now. . ." Harm shrugged his shoulders helplessly.  
  
"Harm," AJ began delicately, "how long as it been since you've had a life outside of JAG?"  
  
Harm blinked and thought about the last time he had done any activity that had not included someone from JAG. Dinners with Mac, basketball with Sturgis, barbeques at the Roberts. . . "It's . . . been a long time, Sir. All my friends are here," he explained.  
  
"I know. It makes for an incredibly strong team environment, one that has proven itself successful time and time again. However, it's a double-edged sword. A change might be good for you, Commander. However, I'd like to offer you an alternative to retirement."  
  
"What would that be, Sir?"  
  
"Captain Deyo retired yesterday. How would you like to take over for him at the Naples office?" AJ asked.  
  
The afternoon had been full of shocks, and to Harm, there seemed to be no end. "But he was head of JAG Europe!" He exclaimed.   
  
"That he was," AJ agreed. "I won't lie to you Harm, this would a very challenging position for you. You wouldn't have any investigative duties, and you'll be lucky to be in court once or twice a year. Your administrative and political skills will be pushed to their limits. You wouldn't really be a lawyer anymore. You'd be a leader."  
  
Harm was visibly shaken at this point. "I don't know what to say, Sir. I mean, I'm not a Captain."  
  
"That will change in about six months," AJ replied evenly. "That is, if you don't screw things up."  
  
"I appreciate your confidence in me." Harm smiled thoughtfully. "Lindsay is going to be pissed."  
  
The admiral allowed himself to express a truly wicked grin. "I know."  
  
"Can I take some time. . . time to think about this?"  
  
"You have a week. Harm, your options are limited," AJ warned. "If you don't take this, you might as well retire and enter a private practice. Lindsay wants you riding a desk buried deep in the Pentagon somewhere."  
  
Harm smiled hopefully. "I don't suppose there are any more openings in the judiciary?"  
  
"I thought you didn't like being a judge. That your strengths don't lie in that area."  
  
"It wasn't that bad. I mean, I could always learn. . ."  
  
AJ chuckled. "If you want to be THAT close to Colonel MacKenzie, there are better ways to go about it." He waved off Harm's immediate protest. "I'm afraid that's not an option, anyway. The SECNAV wasn't entirely pleased with your handling of that friendly fire incident."  
  
"I can imagine." Harm sighed. "I'll let you know when I make my decision."  
  
"Good enough. I'd hate the see the Navy lose you, Commander. Dismissed."  
  
(I guess I should be happy,) Harm thought. (but I'm not.) He left the Admiral's office feeling less sure of himself than he had in any time of his life since his ramp strike. 


	2. Chapter Two

The Only Constant  
----------------------  
By: Anand Rao  
  
Chapter Two  
---------------------------------  
DAY 2  
  
Harm walked into his office, rubbed his tired eyes, and took a large gulp of coffee. He had left the office right after his meeting the Admiral the day before. He spent the entire evening ignoring phone calls from Mac, Sturgis, Bud, and Harriet. (Thank God no one decided to just drop by,) he thought. Apparently, the Admiral had told them about the reassignments right after he had told Harm. He felt slightly guilty for ignoring them, but what was he going to say?  
  
(I wonder what would upset them more, a resignation or a promotion?) He wondered.  
  
He closed the door to his office, sat down at his desk and put his head in his hands. "What am I going to do. . ," he muttered.  
  
He had thought about retiring for months now. He was just getting so tired of fighting with Mac. And when they weren't fighting, he barely saw her. They were in completely different worlds now that she was a judge. A knock on his door interrupted his thoughts.  
  
"Enter."  
  
Mac stepped inside his office, gently closing the door behind her. "Good morning, Harm," she quietly greeted.  
  
Harm sighed. "Good morning, Mac."  
  
"I tried to reach you last night. Why didn't you return my calls?" Her tone of voice wasn't accusing, just inquisitive.  
  
"I'm sorry about that." Harm ran his fingers through his hair. "I just needed to be alone for a bit."  
  
Mac smiled. "I kind of figured. . . That's why I didn't drop by your place last night."  
  
"Thank you for that," Harm laughed.   
  
Mac sat down in front of his desk, her smile gone. "Bud and Harriet are taking this kind of hard. Sturgis and I went to their place for dinner last night. We wanted you to be there."  
  
Harm chose to ignore the gentle rebuke. "And you? How are you taking this?"  
  
(That depends on where you're going,) Mac thought. "I'm. . . not sure yet. I like being a judge, but I wasn't expecting to make a career out of it. I like investigative work." She sighed. "I suppose it beats any alternative Commander Lindsay could come up with."  
  
"Heh. No doubt about that!"  
  
Mac decided to get straight to the point. "Harm? What's going on? The Admiral wouldn't tell any of us about your status. Are. . . are you being transferred?"  
  
Harm leaned back in his chair, a far off look on his face. "You know, when I first joined JAG, I didn't really have any focus in my career or my life. I was just trying to rebuild things and hopefully find a place in the Navy. Worse than not flying, I didn't want to resign. It wasn't until I served under Admiral Cheggwidden that I thought about the future, perhaps, being the JAG myself, one day." He finally looked at Mac.  
  
"Until you left to fly, I always felt that the Admiral was grooming you to take his spot." Mac smiled. "That's the only reason I could think of as for why he continued to put up with you."  
  
She was joking, Harm knew, but he couldn't seem to find the humor in it. "Well, one way or another, he won't have to put up with me anymore."  
  
Mac's blood ran cold. "Where are you going, Harm?"  
  
"I'm probably going to retire, Mac."  
  
Mac shot up from her seat. "Retire?" This was not a response she was expecting. She'd never mention it to anyone, but her previous night's sleep had been plagued by nightmares of Harm's possible transfer to an over seas office, a carrier, or worse, a change of designation as an aviator. "Was the Admiral's offer *that* bad?"  
  
"Not in the way you're thinking," Harm replied. "He offered me Naples."  
  
(No! That's too far!) Mac desperately thought. "That's. . . a long way from Washington."  
  
Harm smiled a bit sadly. "You noticed that too, did you?"  
  
"Would you be serving under Captain Deyo?" Mac couldn't imagine Harm retiring. The Navy was his life. Naples was far, but it wouldn't be a bad move for Harm, career-wise.   
  
Harm's lips quirked slightly. "No, I'd be his replacement. He retired recently."  
  
"Harm. . . You're not being transferred. You're being promoted!" Mac stared at him in shock. "Why in the world are you considering retirement?"  
  
Harm leaned forward suddenly. "Why do you think?" He demanded harshly.   
  
"I don't know." Mac refused to believe it was because of her.   
  
Harm took a deep breath. "I once told you that what I wanted was to never lose you."  
  
"And I told you that you never would," Mac quickly replied. "That hasn't changed."  
  
"Even if I'm in Naples?" Harm countered.  
  
Mac shook her head stubbornly. "You can't give your career for me, Harm. You can't give up this opportunity."  
  
"If our situations were reversed, would you take the transfer?"  
  
A lie quickly grew in Mac's mind, but one look at the raw pain in his Harm's eyes threw all that away. "No," she replied softly.  
  
"Then how can you expect me to do any differently?" He said gently.  
  
Mac didn't have an answer for that. (This isn't right,) she thought.  
  
"I shouldn't have any trouble finding a position in a private practice somewhere," Harm continued.  
  
"It still won't be the Navy, Harm."  
  
The pain in his eyes grew. "I know."  
  
**************************************  
  
"So, rumor has it you're going to be an aviator again."  
  
Harm rolled his eyes at the man who sat the table adjacent to his in the courtroom. "Sturgis, every time someone sneezes in JAG headquarters someone brings out *that* piece of scuttlebutt again."   
  
Sturgis opened his briefcase and pulled out some files. He was prosecuting a case against Harm's client, but this meeting was a formality, the two of them had already worked out a deal. All they had to do was wait for the judge. "Well, seeing as how you're not telling anyone about your new duty station, it's as good a guess as any."  
  
"Fishing for information, Sturgis? This is hardly an appropriate venue for it," Harm replied teasingly.  
  
"Why not?" Sturgis shrugged his shoulders. "Judge MacKenzie hasn't arrived yet." He grinned. "Besides, I'm sure she's as curious as I am."  
  
"She already knows, Sturgis."  
  
"I see."   
  
"It's not really a secret," Harm said defensively. "I have a couple of options and I haven't figured out what to do yet." That wasn't exactly a lie. Harm knew that losing Mac wasn't worth any promotion or reward, but the thought of turning down his own command. . .  
  
"Lieutenant Simms starts at the OIG tomorrow."  
  
"I haven't to talked to Harriet or Bud since this whole mess started," Harm admitted.  
  
"They understand that you have your own problems to face," Sturgis replied reassuringly.   
  
"A bunch of us were planning on taking Harriet out to lunch today; sort of a 'going away' thing. Are you interested in joining us?"  
  
"I'll be there," Harm replied, just as Mac entered the courtroom.  
  
**********************************************  
  
Their morning courtroom duties completed, Harm and Mac met once again in his office. "Harm, how long has the Admiral given you to make up your mind?" Mac asked.  
  
"One week. Why?"  
  
"Can you really just retire, without feeling any regrets?"  
  
Harm forced himself to act cavalier. "Life is full of regrets, Mac." He smiled. "The better question is, can I really leave *you* without any regret?"  
  
Mac blushed and turned away. "I can't believe we're having this conversation."  
  
"I didn't think I'd be trying to kiss you senseless at your engagement party." Harm offered a sheepish grin. "Desperate times. . ."  
  
"This isn't a joke, Harm!" Mac glared at him. "Duty has always come first in your life, and all of a sudden, you seem ready to cast it aside at a time when our country *needs* us the most! Can you really leave all that behind and still be happy?"  
  
Several seconds ticked by as she awaited his answer. "I don't know," he finally replied.  
  
"Then you need to find out."  
  
"How?"  
  
"Ask the Admiral if you could go to Naples for a couple of days. Try to experience what it is that you'll be giving up, Harm. And when, no, if, you come back, we can talk about the future then." The suggestion was a difficult one for Mac. In her mind, there was a very real possibility that she would lose Harm, and if she did, it would be from he own doing.   
  
"You want me to go to Naples?" Harm asked flatly.  
  
"You need to find out what you really want, Harm. Our status quo, our little dance, no longer exists."  
  
She was right. In his heart, he knew it. "I'll talk to the Admiral after lunch," he promised.  
  
"Good. I, uh, have to get some paperwork done before lunch, so I'll talk to you later, okay?"  
  
"Sure. Thanks, Mac." As she quickly left his office, Harm frowned. No matter what happened, this was going to hard and complex, and for the life of him, couldn't figure out how to make it any easier.  
  
--------------------  
End Chapter 2  
  
A/N: Thanks for the feedback on the first part. This has been a fun idea to explore! 


End file.
